The Fearless Blogger

It’s time for me to stop hiding my true self.

I love “The Hills” and still like seeing what Spencer & friends are up to.

Judge all you want -- I’m very secure in my pop culture tastes (or lack thereof!)

Bonus: 10 Pickup Lines for Me Mateys

10 . Avast, me proud beauty! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?

9. Have ya ever met a man with a real yardarm?

8. Come on up and see me urchins.

7. Yes, that is a hornpipe in my pocket and I am happy to see you.

6. I’d love to drop anchor in your lagoon.

5. Pardon me, but would ya mind if I fired me cannon through your porthole?

4. How’d you like to scrape the barnacles off of me rudder?

3. Ya know, darlin’, I’m 97 percent chum free.

2. Well blow me down?

And the number one pickup line for use on International Talk Like a Pirate Day is …

1. Prepare to be boarded.

For even more pickup lines (includin some for the ladies!) set yer sails to  www.talklikeapirate.com.

Let’s kick this weekend off with two of my favorite things combined! IKEA and cats!

(Actually, make that THREE of my favorite things -you can get ice cream at IKEA too!)

The familiar scenario: Walking through IKEA,  giddy from the winding orchestrated showcase rooms, yet unable to shake off the melancholy caused by the tangible absence of cats.

Where some people see problems, others see “opportunities” -- in this particular case, an opportunity to let 100 cats loose in a UK IKEA and capture it on film.

Which gives me a fabulous idea for my 40th birthday (next July -- mark your calendar!).  I wonder if the San Diego IKEA would let me do something similar?  If so, I just have a couple of small requests:

• Balloons scattered throughout the store to enhance the festive party vibe
• Waiters circulating with hor d’oeuvres (meatballs, natch) and cocktails (so the guests don’t have to navigate through the IKEA maze in order to get a drink)
• To simplify things, I ‘d prefer to select the aforementioned waiters to be selected from the following pool of  pre-screened candidates: Eric Dane*, David Beckham*, Gael Garcia Bernal, Josh Holloway*, Jude Law, Ewan McGregor, Colin Farrell*, Bradley Cooper* and Johnny Depp (names with asterisks (*) denote those who should check their shirts at the door)
• Disco ball and bubble machine in the warehouse (Bonus: get Party Ben to DJ)
• Ball pit emptied (and sanitized) then refilled with pom-poms, cat nip and kittens.
• Working entertainment systems in each of the living room showcases playing cute/funny animal videos (with a special emphasis on an inter-species buddy theme). Side tables should hold bowls of pretzels, M&M’s and ChexMix
• Birthday cake in each dining room showcase
• A champagne birthday toast in the bed and mattress display area, followed by a brief performance by Justin Timberlake.
• Birthday hats on all of the cats (I am fine with them choosing to bring a favorite from home or to make their own)

On another note: If you don’t want to watch the “making of” or can’t wait to see the final resulting IKEA commercial, here it is:

via Laughing Squid via Doobybrain
hat cat tip: Billy King

Honestly, with my boy Justin Timberlake in the movie, I would have watched it even if it was just him making Facebook status updates for two hours.

But, I have to admit,  the new “Facebook Movie” looks like it has actual potential.   I guess one shouldn’t expect less from a David Fincher movie though (one scored by Trent Reznor, no less).  hat tip: Digital Inspiration

(I love that the name is not actually “The Facebook Movie” but that’s what everyone calls it!)

More of a retro, Myspace fan?  You’re in luck! For you Tom fans -- er, friends -- out there, there’s a movie for you as well!  OK, not really, but the Huffington Post shared a “trailer” from Best Week Ever here.

What do you think? Will this be a movie you’ll be checking out?

I found this clip when I was looking for the Chris Farley videos for last next week’s post.

This is dedicated to anyone who may have been feeling – or maybe just realized – they’ve been “phoning it in” lately.

Hopefully it will inspire you to remember what it’s like to want to give 100% and maybe find your way back to that.

At the very least, it starts your week out with a solid dose of Steve Martin and a smile.

Just remember: If Rob Schneider can do it, so can you!